I Need Space She Won’t Give??
I married my wife in October. I was very keen to marry her (more so than her) as i thought she was the most wonderful woman. We found out to our delight that she was pregnant just before.
She has an 18yr old son and I a 19yr old. Her son went to live with her parents (he used to hit her and has since been diagnosed with severe depression since his father tried to kill him and my wife and raped her.
My wife moved in with me and my son. Shortly after she got upset missing her son. I told her if we found a bigger hosue he could live with us (I live in a 2bed). I was offered a 3bed house and turned it down. She got upset with this but I told her I would never live with her son because of his manner. My son is perfect hers is not.
My wife told me that her son was actually happier with her parents as their house had bad memories for him (the attack happened there and since her ex went to prison her windows have been broken a few times). She said the reason she wanted the 3bed house is so theres room for my son and the baby. I understand this but didnt trust her. Now I may be prepared to accept a 3bed house but she no longer wants to, saying she needed me to show i was committed & have somewhere for us to have the baby. Originally my son was goiong to live with his mum – my wife thought the 3bed house was a solution as I’d be devastated if he left – now however she says she wants the original plan.
She is upset that I’m leaving her weeks before she is due to go on holiday alone – but I need to lay on the beach and get away.
She still has her old house – though it is being renovated – so I told her to go back there. She keeps crying, saying that she wants us to be togehter and wants us to be a family. But my son has told me he is fed up with her being here and misses it being just me and him – and I miss the old times too. I am not prepared to upset my son, or move (he likes this house so do I) just for her when she has her own place. (There is not enough room for my son & baby).
She asked me the other night if we’d ever be a family & told her I hoped so in the future. She is very upset.about my holiday and has now said that she will be going away with her parents when our baby is a couple of months old. I assummed we’d go on holdiay as a family & guess she is being a b$$ch becos of my holiday when she is pregnant.
She has started to annoy me by talking to male friends online – I know she is doing this to annoy me – but I know she loves me & wouldn’t do anything.
Why can’t she understand that right now i have other priorities? She said to me the other day that all she wants is a family which I can’t give her – I didn’t know what to say so she took it she was right. I rearranged the holdiay so I could accompany her to the scan & obstetrician (she needs a late scan due to possible complications) but she has told me she doesn’t want me there if I can;t stay with her the next week. She also has started saying that she doesn’t want me at the birth if I can’t cancel my holdiay… she is ridiculous.
I want to commit but can’t right now. How do I calm her down and stop her from keeping on getting the hump?
your wife has been asking us the same stuff and it is nice to hear your side of the story. its just better for you both to discuss this together instead of asking strangers like us (although we have given plenty of advice to your wife) or go for couples therapy.
Put your shaboigan in her mouth, and, being careful as not to damage your rod, shoot her in the back of the head with a .357 mag
give it up buddy, no matter how often you post this question, the answers are not going to change.
You should not have married her. You sound like a jerk. You told her he son could move in, then said he can’t, you are leaving her when she’s very pregnant, you think your son is perfect when I can assure you he is not, he’s just YOURS. Ugh, I feel for this poor woman.
Who the hell goes on a holiday when their wife is pregnant??? And how the hell can you say you want the “old times” back with your son?? TOO BAD, YOU’RE MARRIED NOW AND YOUR SON IS 19, AN ADULT! YOUR WIFE IS SUPPOSED TO BE YOUR FIRST PRIORITY DUMBASS. Grow up you loser! I feel terrible for your wife. She is pregnant and desperately needs your love and support and you want to go on a holiday! UNBELIEVABLE!
Honey, if you are married you should already be committed. And truly, if you’re going on a holiday by yourself, doesn’t she have the same right?
There is no reason for her to have kept her old house if either one of you expected your marriage to work. Why does she need her own place? If there is not enough room for your son and your baby, you do need to move. Or is your holiday and your house more important than making room for the new family you’ve chosen to add?
It sounds to me like neither one of you was ready to tie the knot. Did you get married because of the baby? Perhaps what you both need is time apart to evaluate your situation.